It is a real shame that this isn't real. Nothing sounds better than a shower marg! Your partner is going to be so disappointed.
You can get the "Shower Margarita Machine" Gift Box on Amazon for $8.
It doesn't matter if your partner is going to be the one wearing the holster or the one eating the donuts. Either way, you can be sure that this packaging is more exciting than the gift itself.
You can get the "Donut Holster" Gift Box on Amazon for $8.
Your partner will get excited thinking about how much time that they will save when they see the outside of this gift box. They're going to be absolutely crushed when they figure out that you actually got them something nice.
You can get the "Roto Wipe" Gift Box on Amazon for $8.
Every bathroom needs a plant or two. Is there not enough room in the bathroom of your small studio apartment? Don't worry, with this toilet meadow you don't need to sacrifice any precious floor or shelf space. Well, ya know... if this was an actual product.
You can get the "Toilet Meadow" Gift Box on Amazon for $8.
Does your partner always have to pee? Is their small bladder always interrupting your time together? This gift box is a lighthearted way to send the message that they drive you insane, but you love them anyway.
You can get the "Yourinal" Gift Box on Amazon for $8.
This gift box will have the greatest impact if for a couple of weeks leading up to gifting, you casually start talking about branding and how you find it interesting. They will find it a bit weird but they won't think much of it. Then they will see this gift box and be instantly terrified. How jolly!?
You can get the "Home Branding Kit" Gift Box on Amazon for $8.
Once again, if you need to fit a plant into your bathroom, this imaginary product could help! Instead of bringing the plant to the bathroom, you bring the bathroom to the plant. It's almost poetic. Someone please email me a haiku about it.
You can get the "Plant Urinal" Gift Box on Amazon for $8.
Did you ever have a Tooth Tunes toothbrush? What song did yours play? What song did your partner's play? Wouldn't it be cool if your toilet serenaded you in a similar fashion?
You can get the "Toilet Tunes" Gift Box on Amazon for $8.
If your partner is really disappointed that you didn't actually gift them ankle anchors, you can always make it up to them with Bala Bangles. They're basically the same, right?
You can get the "Ankle Anchors" Gift Box on Amazon for $8.
If you and your partner are raising a newborn, they will surely be disappointed when they figure out that the box is a lie. This product would save you both many mid-night trips to the crib.
You can get the "Crib Dribbler" Gift Box on Amazon for $8.
I actually gifted my mother a pair of mittens in this box last year. She was thrilled when she saw the gift box, less thrilled when she looked inside. If your partner is a slight pyromaniac like my mother, perhaps you could DIY the box contents and make their dreams a reality!
You can get the "My First Fire" Gift Box on Amazon for $8.
If your partner is from Wisconsin, I would recommend that you avoid this gift box in particular. Their initial excitement and following devastation will not make the atmosphere very cheerful.
You can get the "Cheese Printer" Gift Box on Amazon for $8.
Does your partner not shut up about how good they are at puzzles? Just wait until you see the look of fear on their face when they think that they are going to need to complete a 12,000 piece puzzle to prove to themselves that they are superior.
You can get the "12,000 Piece Jigsaw Puzzle" Gift Box on Amazon for $8.
Help your partner reduce their food waste and be more environmentally-friendly. Think, over the course of a year, the broken pieces of pasta that you encounter could be recycled into a few new noodles!
You can get the "Pasta Recycler" Gift Box on Amazon for $8.
Does your partner suck at responding to texts? Maybe they just need to switch things up in the communication department to keep things exciting! Walkie talkies are obviously an excellent choice for spicing things up in your relationship, but these have the added feature of holding coffee! Isn't that perfect?
You can get the "Coffee Talkies" Gift Box on Amazon for $8.