14 Communication Exercises for Couples

Whether you’re in the “just vibing” phase or the “we share playlists” stage, knowing how to have an open, cards-on-the-table type of conversation is key. Instead of rehashing the usual "How was your day?" routine, incorporating daily activities can open up fresh avenues for connection. So let’s dive in! Here are 14 communication exercises to get the chats flowing.

1. Have a daily check-in

Think of the daily check-in as your morning coffee—essential for starting the day on the right foot. Set aside 10–15 minutes daily to focus on catching up with your partner. This isn’t about planning errands or logistics; it’s your time to share thoughts and feelings, which will ultimately improve how you connect with each other.

2. The highs and lows game

The Highs and Lows Game is a great way to keep the conversation flowing and get a glimpse into each other's day. Share one high point and one low point, then ask follow-up questions to dig a little deeper. Keep the vibe supportive and curious—it’s all about connecting, not critiquing.

3. Try a partner quiz

Even if you think you know everything there is to possibly know about your partner, quizzes can spark new insights. You might find out who your partner’s secret celebrity crush is, or where they want to travel to. They might also find out that you want to try skydiving or sing karaoke, like every Friday. Pick a quiz you’re both into, share your results, and if it fits, brainstorm ways to add these insights into your daily lives. Official has over 200 partner quizzes to choose from to help level up your connection. 

4. The mirroring exercise

Time to step into your therapist shoes with the Mirroring Exercise. This one’s all about building empathy. Just repeat what your partner says—it’s a great way to get on their wavelength. One of you kicks things off by sharing a thought while the other just listens—no interruptions! After they’re done, the listener responds: “I heard you say [insert what they think you mean].” The first partner can confirm or clarify. Switch it up and just keep it rolling until you both feel like you’re on the same page. 

5. Think about your individual and joint ‘side quests’

Planning your future together should feel like a shared adventure. The Side Quests Exercise is your chance to dive into each other's hopes, dreams, and even those wild fantasies. Find some distraction-free time, and take turns sharing your life goals, travel plans, or just the most outrageous ideas you can think of. Then, brainstorm how you can support each other in making those dreams a reality.

6. Use "I feel" statements

Let’s be real: saying, "You never listen!" won't get you far, while explaining, "I feel unheard when we talk about why being on time is important, especially when you’re late," opens up the conversation. This next exercise is about learning how to share your feelings without pointing fingers. It’s a way to talk honestly, and keep the conversation constructive—which is critical for healthy communication and setting boundaries. Try using "I feel" statements when discussing topics close to your heart: "I feel [emotion] when [situation], and I need [ask]." Keep practicing this and it’ll become second nature in how you two talk.

7. The silent treatment challenge

It’s not what you think! The Silent Treatment Challenge is about exploring non-verbal communication, which can be as powerful as words. Set a five-minute timer and sit facing each other in silence. Use only facial expressions, hand gestures, and body language to convey what you want to say or how you feel. When the timer goes off, chat about what you said and how it felt to connect without using any words.

8. The compliment jar

Who doesn’t appreciate a little love? The Compliment Jar is an easy way to keep the good vibes going. All you need is a jar and some paper. Write down a compliment or something you love about your partner every day and toss it in. Then, at the end of the week or month, read them together and soak up the good vibes. 

9. The question jar

The Question Jar digs a little deeper than the Compliment Jar. Here’s how to do it: Write a bunch of questions on slips of paper and toss them into a jar. Each day or week, pull out a question and take turns answering it. Feel free to mix it up with everything from light-hearted questions to deeper, introspective ones. If you want to make the Jars feel spicier, then why not try a Fantasy Jar?

10. Five minutes of appreciation 

Let those compliments fly. A quick appreciation sesh can do wonders for your relationship. It’s simple, fast, and effective. Set a five-minute timer and take turns saying what you love about each other. The more specific and heartfelt, the better.

11. The monthly review

Okay, it might feel a little corporate, but the Monthly Review Exercise is your time to evaluate your relationship, celebrate your successes, and tackle any challenges together. Set aside an hour each month to chat about what’s been going great and what might need a little TLC. Set goals for the upcoming month and see how you did in the last months—bonus points if you throw in snacks and make a highlights slideshow. 

12. The role-reversal exercise

Let’s switch things up—literally! The Role-Reversal Exercise is a fun way to see the world through your partner’s eyes and boost that empathy meter. Choose a scenario where you two don’t see eye to eye, act it out with switched roles, and then talk about how it felt to be in each other’s shoes. It’s all about seeing the other person's perspective. 

13. Have a conflict resolution session

Conflicts are inevitable, but how you handle them can make or break a relationship. This exercise focuses on resolving disputes healthily and constructively. When conflict arises, take a time-out to cool down before you respond. Set a time to discuss the issue using "I feel" statements and active listening, which helps to validate your partner’s POV. 

14. The post-date debrief 

Date nights are cute, but sometimes, the magic happens in the post-date debrief. After your outing, take a few minutes to chat about the highlights and lowlights. Toss around ideas for your next adventure and figure out the vibe of your next date night. It’s a fun way to reconnect and plan some quality time with each other. 

Make communication exercises routine

Communication is like the glue that holds a relationship together. By incorporating these exercises into your daily routine, those tough conversations will feel less intimidating. It’s all about nurturing that existing connection you two have with each other, so you both feel valued. 

If you liked these communication exercises, you’ll love what the Official app has for you. Digitize your question jar, access partner quizzes, and grow closer with the app specifically designed to keep the vibe flowing in your relationship.